Such heartfelt and deep feelings you are sharing. I’m sorry about your step brother passing away on Christmas Day. That had to have been so hard on your sister-in-law, but I’m glad that they had such a steadfast love and I hope for her a super strength and peace in the future times. Where in PA does your sister-in-law live?
I didn’t know if you’d picked up on this in any of my writings, but my brother broke his neck in a high school wrestling accident when he was 15 and was a quadriplegic until he died at age 56 in 2004. My parents took care of him at home all those years, and it probably goes without saying that our lives were turned inside out. We all loved and supported John so much and he became the hub of our household. We all learned to be humble, more understanding and I believe better people, because of him. I often wonder how our lives (including John’s) would have been different had that “twist of fate freak accident” not happened to him. But being in the midst of all that had become our lives after the accident, we coped and adjusted and did the best we could to have a normal and regular life. And saying that, I think John (within a few years after the accident) adjusted better to the cards that were dealt him than the rest of us did. He accepted that as his life and made the best with what he had. John touched many lives, some we will never know about and I bet your step brother did the same, but you may never know. Anyone with any feeling can’t come away from seeing or living close to a situation like that without it making some pretty profound impressions.
If we look around, and sometimes not very far, there are always those worse off than we are, but someone once told me that does not diminish our trouble or burden in any way. We are all so different and some can handle and/or cope with things way beyond someone else’s capabilities.
I think we all live each day struggling with basic things and never seem to get it right. Even though I know what I should do when things are going poorly, I need constant reminders all the time. The solutions or choices I have need to be brought up, thought about and, reinforced on a regular basis…over and over and over.
Ha! I never liked making resolutions, because they would always somehow seem to set me up for failure. So I think for me just trying to live the “golden rule” of do unto others, and don’t judge until you are walking in that person’s shoes, are good enough for me. So much of our lives seem to fall within the realm of those two things.
No need to apologize for your rant…we all need a safe place to do it and we all need to do it instead of holding it inside. And for what it’s worth, I think your grandson is one very lucky boy to have you looking out for, loving and guiding him in his life. I bet, without hesitation, that he will be a better person because of you. So many kids never have anyone like this or even know what it feels like to have someone care so much.
Gad, so sorry for the long length of the comment. Sometimes I don't know when to stop. :))
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2014-01-01 09:55 pm (UTC)I didn’t know if you’d picked up on this in any of my writings, but my brother broke his neck in a high school wrestling accident when he was 15 and was a quadriplegic until he died at age 56 in 2004. My parents took care of him at home all those years, and it probably goes without saying that our lives were turned inside out. We all loved and supported John so much and he became the hub of our household. We all learned to be humble, more understanding and I believe better people, because of him. I often wonder how our lives (including John’s) would have been different had that “twist of fate freak accident” not happened to him. But being in the midst of all that had become our lives after the accident, we coped and adjusted and did the best we could to have a normal and regular life. And saying that, I think John (within a few years after the accident) adjusted better to the cards that were dealt him than the rest of us did. He accepted that as his life and made the best with what he had. John touched many lives, some we will never know about and I bet your step brother did the same, but you may never know. Anyone with any feeling can’t come away from seeing or living close to a situation like that without it making some pretty profound impressions.
If we look around, and sometimes not very far, there are always those worse off than we are, but someone once told me that does not diminish our trouble or burden in any way. We are all so different and some can handle and/or cope with things way beyond someone else’s capabilities.
I think we all live each day struggling with basic things and never seem to get it right. Even though I know what I should do when things are going poorly, I need constant reminders all the time. The solutions or choices I have need to be brought up, thought about and, reinforced on a regular basis…over and over and over.
Ha! I never liked making resolutions, because they would always somehow seem to set me up for failure. So I think for me just trying to live the “golden rule” of do unto others, and don’t judge until you are walking in that person’s shoes, are good enough for me. So much of our lives seem to fall within the realm of those two things.
No need to apologize for your rant…we all need a safe place to do it and we all need to do it instead of holding it inside. And for what it’s worth, I think your grandson is one very lucky boy to have you looking out for, loving and guiding him in his life. I bet, without hesitation, that he will be a better person because of you. So many kids never have anyone like this or even know what it feels like to have someone care so much.
Gad, so sorry for the long length of the comment. Sometimes I don't know when to stop. :))