Thanks E, I truly appreciate your sharing this with me. Maybe I'm wrong in thinking that I'm somehow required to choose between total recall and totally forgetting. Because, in reality, we don't get to choose. We live our lives, in the aftermath of these events, somewhere between.
What we can choose, I suppose, is where we focus our attention, our remaining life and energies. And I know that you're right about which one will lead to the better outcome, going forward. For ourselves and the people we care most about.
Occasionally I wonder if what I'm feeling, what I choose to feel, is driven by guilt. But those thoughts are quickly overcome, in light of what she and I accomplished together. In what was the worst of times for both of us. Which is somrthing that I know, absolutely, stands on its own.
So, here we are, facing life. I'm so grateful for your friendship and words of advice. And I think, after taking a minute to catch my breath, that I'll be moving on to whatever else it may have in store for me.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2018-01-16 04:20 pm (UTC)What we can choose, I suppose, is where we focus our attention, our remaining life and energies. And I know that you're right about which one will lead to the better outcome, going forward. For ourselves and the people we care most about.
Occasionally I wonder if what I'm feeling, what I choose to feel, is driven by guilt. But those thoughts are quickly overcome, in light of what she and I accomplished together. In what was the worst of times for both of us. Which is somrthing that I know, absolutely, stands on its own.
So, here we are, facing life. I'm so grateful for your friendship and words of advice. And I think, after taking a minute to catch my breath, that I'll be moving on to whatever else it may have in store for me.
My best to you always...