Inevitable

At the end of a difficult week, in which he was twice made late for school by the so-called "responsible adults" in his life, our grandson racked up five awards at the monthly ceremony held for the entire third grade of his K-8 school. Among them was the "Principal's Award" which is given to the outstanding student in each of the (4) third grade classes.

But while his grandmother and I are ecstatic over his accomplishments, we are also deeply concerned that the lack of the most basic, everyday support for his efforts will slowly errode his motivation and ultimately turn him away from strategies and goals which could help assure his success in school and in life.

Among the decisions recently made, by those legally responsible for his care and well-being, is the decision to remove him from the home where he has resided for most of the nearly nine years of his life. Unfortunately, because we are only his grandparents, we have no standing in the eyes of the legal system to challenge such decisions.

So it now seems our sad duty to passively witness what seems inevitable, unable to intercede on behalf of this precious child except in the most egregious circumstances, should they become known to us. And so we wait and watch and listen. Hoping, ironically, that the time never comes when circumstances may empower us to act...

LPK
LiveJournal
1.7.2012 (a)

Ripping Off the Band-Aid

My grandson stayed in town last night because he had indoor soccer practice on Friday night and a game on Saturday morning. Which means that he also slept at the house and that we quite naturally fell back into the routine that we were used to when he was living here.

But as much as I love having him around, it's like the proverbial band-aid being ripped off the healing wound, each time that he leaves, because it feels like I'm once more facing the empty house for the very first time.

So I'm trying very hard to believe that those feelings will gradually recede, in frequency and intensity, over time. And that time, which is now mine to use as I will, can be turned to productive and life-enhancing purposes.

I need to believe that. But I also need to believe that his father, and his father's new partner, truly recognize what they've undertaken in taking over this child's life. And that they are capable of understanding the necessity of sometimes putting aside their own needs in order to accomodate his.

Which may, in fact, be at the heart of my own problems with this. That I'm finding it difficult to believe that someone, who has had the luxury of living his own life as if it were the only one that mattered, can suddenly turn that around in consideration of this child who has always loved him but who now truly needs him because there's no one else.

I'd always heard that it was difficult to stand at the edge and breathe. Now I'm finding that it's even harder to be there and believe...

LPK
LiveJournal
1.7.2012 (b)