Could I Choose That?
Oct. 3rd, 2020 11:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thisnewdayMy chest hurt so badly this morning, from riding in the cold air, that I wondered if I was having a heart attack.
But when I got home and parked the bike indoors, I felt better almost immediately.
It made me think about what our friend, rebeccmeister, had said about her rowing coach's friend. The one who died of a heart attack while rowing.
That he would've wanted to go that way, doing what he loved most in this life.
I used to tell my daughter that if they found me slumped beside the treadmill, that'd be fine.
But these days I'm of two minds about this. I understand wanting to do what you love up to your last minute.
There are times when I feel that way about the bike. But then, why spoil something that feels like the pinnacle of life with something like death?
I mean, nobody especially likes walking/running on a treadmill. Its very name is used to invoke "the daily grind," working your butt off and getting nowhere.
The difference is, the fitness machine keeps us healthy and fit. And I'd like to be THAT, if I can, to the very end.
And being found, in a mortal heap beside it, would mean that I'd done it. Without that moment, when the lights went out, having spoiled anything fun. See?
Whereas the bike, well, that's life, that's fitness, that's the ultimate rush. At least these days.
But maybe falling off of it, when it was locked in the mag trainer on a dreary winter day, would work for me.
Could I choose that? LOL...
LPK
Dreamwidth
10.3.2020
But when I got home and parked the bike indoors, I felt better almost immediately.
It made me think about what our friend, rebeccmeister, had said about her rowing coach's friend. The one who died of a heart attack while rowing.
That he would've wanted to go that way, doing what he loved most in this life.
I used to tell my daughter that if they found me slumped beside the treadmill, that'd be fine.
But these days I'm of two minds about this. I understand wanting to do what you love up to your last minute.
There are times when I feel that way about the bike. But then, why spoil something that feels like the pinnacle of life with something like death?
I mean, nobody especially likes walking/running on a treadmill. Its very name is used to invoke "the daily grind," working your butt off and getting nowhere.
The difference is, the fitness machine keeps us healthy and fit. And I'd like to be THAT, if I can, to the very end.
And being found, in a mortal heap beside it, would mean that I'd done it. Without that moment, when the lights went out, having spoiled anything fun. See?
Whereas the bike, well, that's life, that's fitness, that's the ultimate rush. At least these days.
But maybe falling off of it, when it was locked in the mag trainer on a dreary winter day, would work for me.
Could I choose that? LOL...
LPK
Dreamwidth
10.3.2020
