Beatdown

Mar. 18th, 2012 08:15 pm
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Saturday was another beatdown for my grandson's 9-and-under coed soccer team. To start with, there were four no-shows, including two of the team's best all-around players. And, because we had only a single reserve on the bench, Jason played the entire game without a break, except at the half. The score, at the end, was 7-2 and Jason had scored both of his team's goals.

As usual, he played well. Not flawlessly, but well. He's definitely strongest on offense, where he plays center-forward. He's an exceptional ball-handler, looks to pass when there's an opportunity, and is reasonably accurate when he does. Unfortunately, there's seldom anyone on the other end who can do much with his passes. He's also gotten good about playing his zone, so as to provide an outlet for his teammates. Again, the unfortunate thing is that only a couple of his teammates play with any awareness of the field or are able to pass with any degree of accuracy.

I've previously said that I support a policy of inclusiveness for this team. And I've always made allowances for that in assessing our performance. Our coach is also very laid-back, with respect to his coaching style and expectations. And I'm OK with that as well. Kids this age don't learn or perform well with people yelling at them. And they certainly don't have fun, which is presumably why we're all doing this.

But it's also not much fun being beaten every week, even though we give lip-service to the notion that winning is not the important thing. The thing is, different kids are in it for different reasons. Your kid may be there because he needs to attain a minimal level of fitness while mine may be there precisely because he needs to learn to be competitive. The point is that neither of our kids are being helped toward their respective goals if they're not being supported by the adults who signed them up in the first place.

So if your kid doesn't come to practice, misses games, never sees mom or dad or grampa in the bleachers, and doesn't get any help at home during the week, then both of our kids are suffering for it. (My sister was a single mom who worked full time and wasn't particularly athletic. She grew up in that unfortunate era when girls were called unflattering names if they were. But she learned to throw and catch and bat well enough to help her son participate in Little League.)

Please understand that the LAST thing I'd want in this life is to be one of those Sarah Palin-described "pit bulls in lipstick" who sometimes prowl the sidelines at our games. Aside from the fact that I've never found a shade of lipstick that goes well with my complexion, I think they give kids' sports a bad name and do a disservice to every child and family that's appropriately involved.

But c'mon, if my grandson can run his nine-year-old a$$ off every week, at practice and in games, can throttle back his desire to win so that your child can participate, then I think you might just consider getting up off the couch, putting away the chips'n'dips, and investing a little of your well-fed self as well.

Anyway, that's my rant to start the new week. The game did have its moments and, as I pointed out to my once again disconsolate grandson, a number of his teammates did play very hard and showed a desire to at least compete, if not win. And Jason himself figured in a few more of those "plays of the day" where he fights through 3 or 4 opposing players with that dazzling footwork of his, comes out the other side with the ball, and goes streaking toward the opposing goal.

So if there's a lesson to be learned from this, anything at all to be gained from these weekly beatdowns, it's that one person can't carry the team and that it takes a broadly-supported team to at least be competitive...

LPK
LiveJournal
3.18.2012 (b)
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We just got back, a short while ago, from Little Jay's last indoor soccer game of the first fall/winter session. It's been a rough season for them, so far. We began as an outdoor team three years ago and have played one outdoor session every spring and two indoor sessions, of eleven weeks each, every fall/winter season since.

Part of the reason for the tough season is that we switched facilities this fall in order to continue playing on a full-sized field, an option not available for age nine and under coed teams at the other facility. And it's taken us awhile to adjust to playing the full-size field as a coed team.

The other reason is that we've chosen from the start to be an inclusive team. While some of the teams we've played hold tryouts to select players, we've always fielded a broad assortment of kids, some athletic, some not; some fit, some whose parents hope that soccer will encourage fitness; a little gal who was hearing-impaired, a boy on heavy meds for ADHD, and several who are probably a little young for our level.

As a result, we've taken our lumps along the way but always told ourselves and the kids that it's really about learning the fundamentals of the game and having fun. But for some reason that seems to have become harder to buy into lately--for both ourselves and the kids.

And maybe that's because we've never had to endure a season quite as bad as this one. One in which the "mercy rule" has been invoked, and the scoring clock turned off, in at least two or three of our games, for instance.

Still, I've come away from a number of our games feeling like our kids have really accomplished something for themselves. No matter how bad things have gotten, we've always maintained a high level of sportsmanship on the field as well as a measure of personal composure along the sidelines when the games were over.

And some of our older kids, three of them including Little Jay, have become disciplined players who stop the ball, look for a teammate who is open, and actually pass the ball rather than wildly swinging away and kicking it in whatever direction they happen to be facing.

This morning, in fact, three of our five goals were scored off of passes between Little Jay and Maya, a willowy little gal with blazing speed and an astonishingly powerful kick. She and LJ are often paired off against each other in practice drills and the result is always intense. But come game time they seem to have a chemistry between them that's been really good for the team.

That's quite different from five or six games ago, when our rare goals were scored on individual breakaways, usually by Little Jay, Maya, or Hector. And I made the comment to our coach, following one especially dismal defeat, that our kids were finally showing signs of remembering what they did in practice and of playing as a team.

So today we won our last game against the same team that we beat in our first game. And now the kids--as well as their parents and grandparents--have a couple of weeks off before the second session. Unfortunately, this is when you hear those rumors about who's coming back and who's not. And it appears that one of our better players may be one of those mid-season departures, reportedly for a different sport.

The other side of it is that my grandson has caught the eye of one of the dads who played pro soccer for a number of years over in Europe. And following today's game he commented to my son that LJ has some serious talent and really needs to be on another team.

To be honest, as much as I've supported our philosophy and practice of inclusiveness, I've thought the same thing. Even to the point of asking LJ if he thought he'd like to try out for a better team. Because I've always encouraged him to use every interest and every ability to reach those goals that we all have for our children and grandchildren and nieces and nephews.

Which, in his case, would be college. And I've been pretty intent on this because it seems unlikely that his parents will be able to pay for it when the time comes. So I've encouraged him to look at sports, as well as his academics, as a way of helping himself toward a better life through continuing education.

But, when I asked him about a different team, Little Jay unequivocally answered that he'd rather stay with his friends. And that, at least for now, is a good enough answer. Because one of the things we most wanted for him, through his participation in sports, was friends. And here, on this team, he has them...

LPK
LiveJournal
1.28.2012

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